Tag Archives: big

Size Matters

Beauty in the day: he’s a newly inducted 1st grader. His teacher came to the office wearing “a look”, and I knew I was going to get a story.

I was right.

She had noticed that he had spent more time than could appropriately be ignored with his hands – well…actually….um…down his pants.

“Hey Friend, I was noticing this, and I’m worried. Is there a problem with your private parts? Is everything okay?”

“No, it’ isn’t.”

Teacher Friend probed further upon hearing this, and queried, “Did something happen, Friend? Did you get hurt?”

“Well, sometimes it gets this big,” he measured for her with his little hands, “but it’s only supposed to be this big,” he demonstrated further.

I mean, it was Tuesday, after all. Sometimes Tuesdays are like that.

The Bigger the Better

Beauty in the day: little Aussie came in. “Excuse me, but I have some shorts on. They are a size 3, and they are not supposed to fit me anymore, but instead they keep, well, slipping down all day, and I have had about all I can take of pulling them back up again (again pronounced “ah-gane”).”

“Well, that’s a bit of a problem, then isn’t it? School is over in 18 minutes, so instead of calling your mom, perhaps we can find some string to fashion a belt for you. What do you think?”

His thought ran toward the affirmative, so I set about my task. Road block: I could find no string. SOMEONE has my string. “Um, Friend, I can find no string, but I have this polka-dot red curling ribbon. What do you thing about us using this?”

As luck would have it, his thoughts again ran toward the affirmative.

I fashioned the makeshift belt, and tied a knot. “When you get home, your mom can use scissors to cut off this belt.”

“Alright,” he agreed. “I think my mom should save these shorts for me when I have grown a bit bigger, because I do know that I plan to grow some more.”

#biggerisbetter